Back to Work

Sigh.  I started back to work on Monday.  I'm just doing 1/2 days for the first few days.  Early dismissal on Friday and Memorial Day on Monday.  Good way to ease in.  She was 11 weeks on Monday.  I don't know whether it was easier than when I had to leave Carson....but I guess at least I am more familiar with the daycare and the process as a whole.  It's still really really hard to leave your baby.  It's difficult to turn over this little bundle to essential strangers.  I just have to hope that they'll love her and take care of her.  And we'll just have to make the very most of our time together now.  I'm just scared to miss out on things.  And it breaks my heart to think of her crying and them having their hands full with other babies......
She's the youngest right now.  There are 5 others I believe - a couple 4-5 mo olds and a couple 8-9 mo olds.  So hopefully they'll snuggle more with her while the older babies are able to play a bit more.  :)

I didn't cry dropping her off or anything so that was good.  :)  Rather, my first set of tears was on pick up on the second day.  I walked in to see my 11 week old in a jumperoo.  A freaking jumperoo!  Umm, pretty sure the suggested age for that is a minimum 4 mos.  And they have to be able to have their feet flat on the ground.  UGH!  I kind of played it off and said "She's not big enough for that, is she?!"  They kind of laughed and said something like "yeah, we weren't sure, but she fit".  It sometimes sucks that she's so big because people think she's older than she is.  She may be big, but she's just a peanut baby, people!  I got more upset about it as I drove home w/ images of her bouncing around and her head flopping around.  I know - I'm not dramatic at all, right?  ;)  Haha.  Anyway, I told them the next morning that I didn't think she was old enough for that and I didn't feel comfortable with her in it so if they could hold off for at least another month or so, that would be great.  But it makes me wonder what else they'll do throughout the day.  :(  It's just hard not being the primary caregiver for your own child during the day. 

Her teachers actually seem very nice.  One is the mom of a boy in Carson's class.  She was very understanding when I talked to her.  Although I didn't feel like I hammered it home enough.  (I have a tendency to beat a dead horse sometimes  :) Although I know not always necessary).  She was receptive though so I'm trying to get over it.  It really wasn't that big of a deal, but like I said, it's just hard to have others care for your child and know that it's not the same as if it were you.  :(  Overall though, Avery's doing really well there.  She's eating well and napping okay.  She does seem fussier at night but I think she's tired.  Like with Carson, I think all the activity of the day just wipes them out and they need to go to bed earlier.  But that really really sucks for working parents!  They told me that other teachers have been coming down to snuggle with her too so that's nice to hear.  Everyone seems to love Carson and they've all been really excited to meet Avery.  He's turned out really well and learned so much from being there and I just have to trust that she's going to have the same great experience.  :) 

On a positive note, it is really nice to be around people again.  It's nice to get into a routine again.  It's even nice to wear clothes other than lounge pants.  :)  Even though that's really all I can fit into right now.  We won't get into that though.  ;)  The actual work stuff....eh....we won't talk about that either.  :)

First day of "school" - "I did well Mommy!"